When you have to “go”

[Happy]

Dang, you guys make things complicated.

[FullChoke]

The times I don't have any I find a nice round stick and clean it out using several patches like I clean my guns.

Hoppe's 9 stings a little.

[NCbowjunkie]

Here's a true story that happened to me, oops got to go, back in a little while

[HFultzjr]

The times I don't have any I find a nice round stick and clean it out using several patches like I clean my guns.

Hoppe's 9 stings a little.

Not too bad as long as you keep it away from the dingle berrries..............LOL!

[Yoder409]

The organized turkey hunter will manage his diet and awake early enough each morning to relieve himself before the hunts begins, eliminating the need to be afield when the moment arises.

True.

But even our brilliant forefathers realized that the Constitution occasionally needed an amendment.  I always hit the woods in as ship (yes........ ship) shape as I can.  But dude................if and when a feller's lower GI tract decides it is gonna play an encore, it's something that oft can NOT be stopped.  Many times I have recited a particular portion of Cheech & Chong's "Up In Smoke" while doing the fast penguin walk in search of a grippin' tree...........

I carry a nice, tidy little flat pack of multi-surface wipes at all times.

[LaLongbeard]

The organized turkey hunter will manage his diet and awake early enough each morning to relieve himself before the hunts begins, eliminating the need to be afield when the moment arises.

One of the many things I learned in the military sometimes you cannot stop what your doing to take a bathroom break lol. On a side note this same "skill" has helped me NEVER have to use a porta Jon on construction jobs lol.

[BottomLand54]

The organized turkey hunter will manage his diet and awake early enough each morning to relieve himself before the hunts begins, eliminating the need to be afield when the moment arises.

One of the many things I learned in the military sometimes you cannot stop what your doing to take a bathroom break lol. On a side note this same "skill" has helped me NEVER have to use a porta Jon on construction jobs lol.

Lol warmth on a cold morning


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[tha bugman]

The organized turkey hunter will manage his diet and awake early enough each morning to relieve himself before the hunts begins, eliminating the need to be afield when the moment arises.

True.

But even our brilliant forefathers realized that the Constitution occasionally needed an amendment.  I always hit the woods in as ship (yes........ ship) shape as I can.  But dude................if and when a feller's lower GI tract decides it is gonna play an encore, it's something that oft can NOT be stopped.  Many times I have recited a particular portion of Cheech & Chong's "Up In Smoke" while doing the fast penguin walk in search of a grippin' tree...........

I carry a nice, tidy little flat pack of multi-surface wipes at all times.

[DrDirtNap]

Something about that big cup of coffee and that long drove in the truck makes it happen as soon as I get into the woods.


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[Yoder409]

The organized turkey hunter will manage his diet and awake early enough each morning to relieve himself before the hunts begins, eliminating the need to be afield when the moment arises.

True.

But even our brilliant forefathers realized that the Constitution occasionally needed an amendment.  I always hit the woods in as ship (yes........ ship) shape as I can.  But dude................if and when a feller's lower GI tract decides it is gonna play an encore, it's something that oft can NOT be stopped.  Many times I have recited a particular portion of Cheech & Chong's "Up In Smoke" while doing the fast penguin walk in search of a grippin' tree...........

I carry a nice, tidy little flat pack of multi-surface wipes at all times.

I reckon SOMEBODY knows his Cheech & Chong movies.............

[NCbowjunkie]

True.

But even our brilliant forefathers realized that the Constitution occasionally needed an amendment.  I always hit the woods in as ship (yes........ ship) shape as I can.  But dude................if and when a feller's lower GI tract decides it is gonna play an encore, it's something that oft can NOT be stopped.  Many times I have recited a particular portion of Cheech & Chong's "Up In Smoke" while doing the fast penguin walk in search of a grippin' tree...........

I carry a nice, tidy little flat pack of multi-surface wipes at all times.
[/quote]

Yoder explain the grippin tree part    I have always looked for a good down tree with a fork in the limbs

[Yoder409]

Yoder explain the grippin tree part    I have always looked for a good down tree with a fork in the limbs

A grippin' tree.....................

A tree.  Usually about 3-4 inches in diameter at the grippin' point.  Ideally located on somewhat of a grade.

Directions for use:  Find a suitable grippin' tree as generally described above.  (Please note that under extreme lower GI distress, the parameters for "suitable" can and probably will be lowered considerably and probably in a frantic rush)  Situate yourself on the downslope side of the grippin' tree, facing the tree.  Drop trow.  In the case of bib overalls, insure you have pulled the suspenders well forward between your feet.  Probably best to remove any coat, as well.  Assume the position while simultaneously engaging the grippin' tree firmly with both hands.  Grip it and rip it.  A properly chosen grippin' tree will insure sufficient trajectory of jettisoned materials so as to not have any of the mentioned materials land on your britches or boot heels.  But rather well downhill of your squat position.   

Simple.

[1iagobblergetter]

Yoder explain the grippin tree part    I have always looked for a good down tree with a fork in the limbs

A grippin' tree.....................

A tree.  Usually about 3-4 inches in diameter at the grippin' point.  Ideally located on somewhat of a grade.

Directions for use:  Find a suitable grippin' tree as generally described above.  (Please note that under extreme lower GI distress, the parameters for "suitable" can and probably will be lowered considerably and probably in a frantic rush)  Situate yourself on the downslope side of the grippin' tree, facing the tree.  Drop trow.  In the case of bib overalls, insure you have pulled the suspenders well forward between your feet.  Probably best to remove any coat, as well.  Assume the position while simultaneously engaging the grippin' tree firmly with both hands.  Grip it and rip it.  A properly chosen grippin' tree will insure sufficient trajectory of jettisoned materials so as to not have any of the mentioned materials land on your britches or boot heels.  But rather well downhill of your squat position.   

Simple.

Wow season needs to get here quick....Lol....and not to try out the gripping tree method....

[CtRider]

He's got it down pat - been there myself. The downhill grade it key

[BottomLand54]

I thought them were deer rubs and coyote poop piles behind them...... man I'm glad someone finally explained.


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