I wanted to let you know that earlier today I received my "Obamacare enrollment packet" from the White House. 
It contained:
 
• An aspirin and a band-aid. 
• An 'obummer Hope & Change' bumper sticker 
• A 'Bush's Fault' yard sign 
• A 'Blame Republicans first, then anybody and everybody' poster 
• A 'Tax the Rich' banner 
• An application for unemployment and a free cellphone 
• An application for food stamps 
• A prayer rug 
• A letter assigning my debt to my grandchildren 
• And lastly, a coupon for a machine that blows smoke up my a$$. 
  
Everything was made in "China" and all directions were in Spanish 
Keep an eye out. Yours should be arriving soon.