Friend??? Am I in the wrong?

[fallhnt]

I have a friend who is to lazy to work and this has kept him out of the fall woods for about 5 yrs.Well 3 yrs. ago I got into a big flock of birds and finally got him to hunt with me.Another friend brought him up.We had a good time and then they brought another friend up.This guy killed a turkey.Then my buddy,who is to lazy to work,wants to bring his card playing friends up to show them his mad skills.I asked him not to.This is public land but I was the one taking time away from my family and job to do this and share it with a friend.Then in MO. he wanted to take another guy and I asked him not to.Well opening day of IL. fall season this year he had another one of his friends up and this guy was in my area.This guy could tell i wasn't happy in a txt. I sent him after he crippled a turkey with his bow.So this guy got mad and went home.Out of the 4 of us I was the only one who didn't hunt "my" spot.Now this new friend is going to "wash his hands of me".My friend gets free rides,free meals and free permits.Yes he has people buy his permits so he can go and they get to learn from the pro.Am I wrong on this or is this guy not a real friend?I could go on forever but who wants to.Tell me some thoughts.

[tomstopper]

Any one who shows you that much disrespect would not be my friend. He only cares what he wants/needs and doesn't care about how much time you put into it. I am sorry, but he sounds like a free loader to me.....

[Turkey Trot]

I'm surprised that you need third party opinions on the matter.  You said everything that you need to know to avoid him by stating that he is too lazy to work.  I would not want anything to do with him based on that alone, I don't care for lazy losers. 

He is a loser user and a buddy screwer, not a friend.  He'll let you provide everything he needs to hunt, including scouting and almost roosting birds, and then mess it up for you.  After you go to all the trouble, it's more important for him to hunt with someone else and personally benefit from your labors than it is for you to enjoy hunting your spots.  That means he has little regard for you and is more interested in working the angles to maximize his own benefit.  He is shiftless and greedy in addition to being lazy.  You should be glad to be done with the esso bee.   

[ncturkey]

If he active that he is not a friend. I know a lot of guys that I can tell nothing about we're I hunt or when on game lands. They will have me covered up with friends and family. Had it happen before. Iffix that friend good. I told about a place I had saw some turkey. Coming opening day I drove right past him and he was parked right were I said I had seen turkeys. I was on the way to the real spot where I had seen the turkeys really. He was real mad when I told what I had done. I informed him we were no longer friends.

[turkey_slayer]

Any one who shows you that much disrespect would not be my friend. He only cares what he wants/needs and doesn't care about how much time you put into it. I am sorry, but he sounds like a free loader to me.....

Exactly. I got burnt years ago by one of my best friends that I got into hunting. First rule I told him was never bring anyone I don't care if its your brother, friend, or a family member. I explained the reason why and dag on if he didn't take 3 guys in there and whack 3 deer then he had the nerve to tell me about it. I reminded him of the first rule I taught and thought to myself never again. We still talk and hang out but he doesnt know where I hunt and I don't take him to this day. I've got friends and family I hunt with and I trust but if they aren't willing to scout with me and walk the miles before the season then I tell them I haven't seen seen or heard squat and no sign there. I'm not doing someone else's work!

[captin_hook]

Yepper, no brainer. This is no friend I would want to have. My days of hunting or teaching those guys anything about hunting would be over.

[barry]

You did no wrong.
Get shed of him and find a trustworthy hunting partner or just hunt alone.
I would let him know how you feel should he ever have the nerve to ask to hunt with you again

[Old Gobbler]

 "Moonshine Still" mentality , has been my game plan with hunting spots for decades


As in dont tell nobody where your moonshine still/ hunting spot is,  and you will be able to keep it to hunt for the future

[savduck]

"Moonshine Still" mentality , has been my game plan with hunting spots for decades


As in dont tell nobody where your moonshine still/ hunting spot is,  and you will be able to keep it to hunt for the future

Yep X2

[BOFF]

I believe your post was more of a "venting" post than really "asking" for our opinions on the matter.

I also believe you know in your own mind how you feel, and maybe want confirmation.

I've been blessed to have several friends whom I would not hesitate to share what spots I have turkeys tied up to what tree. I'd just as soon have my buddies kill them, as myself. That being written, I love to turkey hunt, and for the most part, keep my mouth shut.     


On the other hand, I feel your partly at fault.

It reads to me "in between the lines", your "friend asked" before doing so, AND this continued, AND you had ANOTHER friend hunting with you as well. I have no idea what your communication was with him, but if you expected your friend to read your mind, or "hints" then I feel it's your fault.

Don't expect others to know what your thinking.

If you told him flat out something along this line:

"No, I don't want you to bring your friend(s), I've spent 30 hours out here AFTER my work hours in finding these turkeys, and I only want you or I to be the ones chasing after them."

and he did so anyways, AND you allowed it to happen again for other hunts, then your at fault for allowing it to happen.

If it's your fault, take responsibility for it. Take it for what it is.

Communication is the key to any relationship.

I may be way off, but it is just my thoughts for what little information you posted, and you did ask for them. 




Hope you get this resolved, as true friends are harder to come by, but still available.



God Bless,
David B.

[GSLAM95]

There are no doubts in the mind when it comes to true friendship!

[Neill_Prater]

It doesn't really matter if this is partially your fault or not, what you have described is a person with little character and a poor sense of what is right and fair. Some people try to always pay their way, others spend their time figuring out how to avoid doing so. If you enjoy his company, and are willing to overlook his shortcomings, fine. If not, find a new hunting buddy.

I hunted many years with a fellow somewhat like you describe. We always took my vehicle, burned my gas, etc. Half the time, if we stopped somewhere to eat, he wouldn't have any cash on him, and I'd end up paying for both of us. I can't recall a single time in all the years we hunted together when he volunteered to buy my meal. Most years, I'd end up furnishing his shells, because he'd always show up for the hunt "with only a couple left." Still, we were friends, and although he was often exasperating, he was also fun to be in the woods with, so I mostly just overlooked all the bad stuff.

[GobbleNut]

I agree that you should always lay the conditions out right at the start.  Any time I take someone new hunting with me, I tell them right up front,..."I will take you, but you will not come back and hunt the area I take you to without first contacting me and asking if it is okay,...and you will not ever bring anybody else with you to hunt this area.  If you do, and I find out about it, you will regret it!"  ...So far, I have had no problems....

[redarrow]

Kick him to the curb .

[HARDCORE]

Kick him to the curb .