The Bacon Tree :
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the 
United States , wandering aimlessly and starving. They are 
about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a 
sudden Luis says:
"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell.  Ees bacon, I theenk."
"Si, Luis, eet sure smell like bacon. "
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, 
& there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.
There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double 
smoked bacon, every imaginable kind of cured pork.
"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved!  Ees a bacon tree!"
"Luis, maybe ees a meerage?  We ees in the desert don't  forget."
"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of  a meerage that 
smell like bacon? Ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree!"
With that, Luis staggers towards the tree.  He gets to within 
5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a 
machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock.   
Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath:
"Pepe, go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"
"Luis, Luis miamigo, what ees it? "
"Pepe ees not a bacon tree.  Ees...
Ees.... 
Ees...
Ees... 
Ees... 
Ees... 
Ees.... a ham bush." 
  
  
 SO SORRY I know there is something wrong with me for sending you this.  Just couldn't help it!  Little voices made me do it !!! And I bet you tried to do the accent didn't you?  I know you did! 
He,he,he