I'm pretty young (30). I've been hunting and shooting things since I was really young. Birds off the feeder, to now a days, whatever graces the landscape in fur, fin or feather in whatever state or country I'm standing in. Hunting and the feelings it comes with should be in the CDC. It's a disease I cannot describe. One graced and driven by sheer motivation and albeit more so instinctual navigation that my mind cannot help but wander into. My adolescents and youth were spent trudging my way through the forest. If it was a critter, it was getting something shot its way. The amount of joy and fond memories this brought, I wouldn't trade for anything.
Fast forward to my 20's. My emotional attachment to wildlife and the place they inhabit how grown to more than just the sheer want to shoot something. My joy in the experience and attachment to the creature I'm hunting has shifted. I am not trying to sound like a sap. I am not this, but now when I hunt, I do have a different feeling. Knowing full well I'm a lurking. Stalking. Waiting predator that may be fooling my quarry into heading towards me, or me going there direction, I cannot help but feel... just some way about it? Not remorseful, let's not get that mixed up with what I'm trying to say. If I were to feel remorse, I wouldn't be doing it. It's a feeling I cannot put into words. It's the feeling that you acknowledge you took a life, your decision was made, you are honored, humbled, and grateful for the opportunity. You count your lucky stars, you thank the creator and you enjoy the memory of what was and what will be. His/her life ended, usually it was short. They don't know that. We do. No fault of ours, just the nature of it. I'm big into the experience more than the result. I put in the work, I was granted the opportunity. It's just the emotional and spiritual attachment to it all has grown in a way that makes me think about it more. It's a beautiful thing. And one we should never take for granted. I will hunt and will continue to chase this high I have always had. When it stops. My heart will probably go with it.
If you have a good way to describe this feeling, please, enlighten me. I sometimes struggle to find it!
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