Chuck Norris Facts!!!

[crossbow1968]

chuck norris has a grizzly bear rug in his living room,,, it's not dead, it's just scared to move

[jblackburn]

Church Norris impregnates women by pointing at their vaginas and saying "Booya"

Pizza delivery boys tip Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris can hit a home run while playing football

Chuck Norris will mess with Texas

Red bull is actuall Chuck Norris' sweat

Chuck Norris doesn't have to set his watch, time sets itself to Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris can cut a hot knif with butter

Chuck Norris actually died 20 years ago, but death is too afraid to tell him

Waldo is hiding from Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn. He stares at the grass and dares it to grow.

[budtripp]

Chuck Norris once urinated in the fuel tank of a big rig. That truck today is known as Optimus Prime.

No woman has ever had sex with Chuck Norris and lived to tell about it.

Hevi shot is actually made from beads of Chuck Norris's sweat

[darn2ten]

They once made "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take crap from anybody.

[crossbow1968]

chuck norris doesn't need a watch,, he decides what time it is   
when alexander graham bell invented the telephone,, he had 3 missed calls from chuck norris
chuck norris pities mr. t
chuck norris can strangle you with a cell phone
chuck norris knows victorias secret